Ok, you’ve just discovered your husband is cheating on you and you are having a tough time dealing with it, but to make matters worse, he is totally unrepentant and says he wants a divorce. You feel a great sense of loss but you are looking for ways to get your husband back fast before it’s too late.
You thought everything was going on well, you never saw this coming. Or maybe you did have gut feelings that he was cheating, but divorce is something that never even crossed your mind and now it feels as though your whole world has come to an end.
If the situation above describes you and you still love your spouse, I want you to know that no matter how grim the situation looks now, there is hope. If you still love your spouse and after putting two and two together you still feel that you relationship is worth saving, then following the advice below will help steer you in the right direction towards getting him back fast.
Your first inclination will be to beg, cry or reason with him to stay but these pleas never work so DON’T. If you are yearning for the good old days and hope to re-ignite the lost romance, if you want to give your tumultuous relationship another chance, then you have to learn how to win him back. It’s not going to be easy, but it is possible if you are willing and determined to win your man back as you apply the advice below.
First of all, try to ask yourself why your husband cheated on you? Below are some reasons why men cheat. This is not an all-inclusive list but they are points to take into consideration as you seek to repair your broken marriage.
1. You are no longer the same. Maybe because of the stress of handling both family and work life, you have stopped paying attention to your appearance and thus become unappealing to your husband. He no longer sees the beauty he first saw in you.
2. You nag and complain. There is probably no faster way to get a man run away from you than nagging him. Nobody wants to live with a person who complains incessantly. It just makes life miserable.
3. You don’t give him enough sex. Let’s face it. Men love sex more than women and if he does not have enough from you, you are setting him up for temptation.
Once you have identified the problem, you need to start learning to win back your man by increasing passion and connection in your relationship before focusing on the PROBLEMS of your relationship.
When there is enough passion in a marriage, the Big Problems don’t seem nearly as big and can easily be fixed…But… even the smallest problems will seem like mountains when there is no passion. A small emotionally charged date with your spouse will go much farther in healing your marriage…than if you spend hours discussing his affair. I’m not saying that the affair should not be discussed but let it be done at the right time once you’ve secured your marriage.
To increase passion and connection in your marriage;
1. Start working on your appearance. Do the best you can to keep an upbeat look. Sure life can become overwhelming when you have to take care of your husband, children and yourself. By the end of the day you are exhausted and do not have the energy to make yourself look nice and welcome your husband at the door with a pretty smile. But if your marriage is important to you, then there is every reason to dedicate time to look good for him. He will feel proud and honored.
2. Avoid irritating him with your complaints. Make your home a peaceful and restful place he can enjoy after he comes home weary from work. Keep your home clean and clutter free. Take off his shoes, serve him a good meal and why not give him a soothing bath or take one together. Make your home a place where he feels comfortable, free and safe.
3. Improve your sex life. Never deprive your husband of sex inorder to punish him or threaten him. I know no faster way of sending your man into another’s armsy. Find ways to spice up your sex life and break the monotony of your daily routine. Shower and make up before he gets home. Wear sweet-smelling perfume and greet him at the door wearing sexy clothes that will help ignite his desire for you.
4. Don’t be in a hurry. Things won’t get better overnight so patience is a virtue you will greatly need now. Take it in small strides. When talking to him maintain eye contact so he knows you are attentive to him.
5. Slowly try to implement conversation again, make an attempt to talk to him whenever you can. Make a list of all the things you respect and love about him and tell him. You can say something like this. “I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately and made a list of all the things I respect and love about you that I never got to thank you about. I respect you for being our provider and protector and I want to thank you so much for working so hard to take care of your family…”
6. If all you used to do in the past was crush your husband by using words that did nothing but tear down his self-image, then try to give him some compliments for a change. Focus on his positive traits and avoid talking about the negative and see how such respect will let him feel your love and ignite in him feelings of love for you.
7. Make him feel good every time he is around you and he will begin to miss you. It won’t hurt to bring up the good memories of the past. Sharing highlights of the good times you had together will give him something to reminisce upon.
Of course, getting back your husband fast is going to take more than following the simple steps above. Nevertheless they are a good starting point.